Yesterday, I went out to the nearest Jusco to buy some fruits and drinks for iftar. I was out for about 1 hour plus. During that time, there’s no phone-call or message that I received.
Back at home, I check my fb profile (as usual lah). Behold! There’s a message posted on my FB wall, marah me for using the car without telling him. My friends read it, his friends read it and they’ve even post their comment on that humiliating post. He tried to soften out the humiliating post by trying to make it sound like a joke, serious but in a joking way. I didn’t find it funny. I still don’t find it funny at all. I find it humiliating and I was very upset.
My whole life, nobody had ever manage to humiliate me directly, that was until yesterday. I feel so betrayed. Only trusted people can post on my wall, that’s my family, my real-life friends and my game-buddies (I don’t trust them that much, but all they can post on my wall is game related, so I am taking the risk.) That was one the greatest betrayal. What make it hurts so much; it was from the person that I trusted.
When I allowed you guys to post on my wall, or to comment on my pictures, it means I trust you. I trust you to keep the personal thing personal and never humiliate me or yourself. This is a reminder for all of us.
I hope he’s happy with that post, though I’ve deleted it. That was my first reaction when I read it. I didn’t even manage to read all of the comments. I was sitting here alone in my room, and I can feel my face burning red. My first reaction is clicking that ‘remove’ button.
Whoever you are, you’ve taught me the feeling of being betrayed, the feeling of being humiliated, and this is not the first time. My heart is aching and my mind is spinning cuz I can’t understand why you would do this to me. I hope you forgive me for all the pain that I’ve caused you cuz I am trying to forgive you for all the pain that you’ve brought to me and my family. Remembering the good times is all I have left to keep us alive.