Sometimes & Always

Sometimes I woke up in the middle of the night….so many things on my mind….getting back to sleep is impossible…and before I know it, I’ll find it even harder to breath…my mind refused to slow down, all the problem and unwanted situation came rushing back to me….the harder I tried to calm myself, the more impossible it seems…

Sometimes, when the room is so silent, and nobody is around, I find myself staring into the space, so many things on my mind…till I’m not able to figure out exactly what I’m trying to think about. But I love that moment. Through it, if I can have it a little longer, I’ll be able to clear my head a little; I can feel as if the time stop and nothing move. No sound, no disturbance. I truly cherish such moment.

Always, I love the beach. I love watching the waves crashing the beach and the sound is something that can keep me hypnotize. Whenever I’m at the beach, my heart feels so serene, my mind lighter and my heart would smile. I can smile easily…but it’s hard to make my heart smile.

( When I stayed in BNP for two months, I went to the beach every morning, before everyone else is up and just enjoy the ‘loneliness’ that the beach has to offer…)

Always, I feel happy whenever I see a baby smile. A baby’s smile is the most pure smile you can ever get in this world. Their chuckle is even more blissful. When they smile or chuckle, their eyes twinkle and the happiness that they are spreading, is really infectious. You just have to open your heart to accept it.

Sometimes and always I’m really grateful with my life. I’m blessed with such a loving parents, sisters and brothers. When I fall, I can always be assured that there are hands that will help me to stand again. When I cry, I can always lean on one’s shoulder and hang on till I’m strong again. Even when I’m hurting, one will always support me and remind me that I am much stronger and better than I ever realize I am.

Thank you for loving me for who I am.

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